DOOM (Retro Review)

This review was originally published in the 2006 Issue of Morbid Media Magazine


Teri Mabe (AKA Zombie Mom)

In the year 2026, archeologists discover a portal to an ancient city on Mars called “The Ark”. They build a huge research center on Mars and still, 20 years later; do not know why “The Ark” was built or what happened to the people.

They encounter a problem and the research facility is put on lock down. A group of Marines are called into save the scientists and find out who or what is causing the chaos. The squad is led by Sarge, (The Rock from WWE) and his right hand man, Grimm (Karl Urban). Grimm’s sister is also a scientist involved in the research facility which throws tension into the mix.

The rest of the squad is composed of a variety of personalities such as Pinky, Goat, Mac, The Kid, Destroyer and Hell Night.You find yourself liking this bunch of Marines and their quirky ways. The technology is so advanced that they can go from Earth to Mars in a matter of minutes.

They enter the lock down and get sealed in to go  after the mysterious danger lurking inside. The directer, Andrzej Bartkowiak, tries his best to insert the first-person shoo0ter view from the game into the movie.He takes you through dark corridors, around eerie corners and mushing in black sewer water with hideous creatures popping out when you least expect them. these monsters are met with cool futuristic weapons that are enlarged for cause and effect.

The squad is slowly exterminated one by one until the surprise ending.This movie is a cross between “Resident Evil” meets “The Ghosts of Mars”. I really liked it because it had me jumping in my seat and peeking through my hands.

I would rate it a 3 out of 5 and I hope they continue making video game movies because they usually turn out better than expected. My favorite part was at the end, but if I tell you that, it would ruin it for you;so go out and rent “DOOM” today!

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PG-13 Rated Horror Films

Originally Published in Morbid Media Magazine, 2006


Shawn Baublitz


When I look back at horror movies I love, I think of “The Evil Dead”, “Scream”, “Friday The 13th”, “Nightmare on Elm Street”, “Hellraiser” and all of the classics. What I do not think about is “The Boogeyman”, “Dark Water”, the “War of the Worlds” remake or the “When A Stranger Calls” remake. All of which were PG-13.

I might be a horror snob. When I think horror I think about blood, guts, partial nudity,heavy metal music and senseless violence. I want the hero, male or female, to kick ass. I do not want implied scares or actors walking around whining about every little thing. I know people who really like horror, want to see Ash chopping a demon’s head off with a chainsaw while yelling¬† “Hail to the King, baby”, Jason ripping a half naked woman apart with a pair of hedge clippers; or zombies infesting a city with only food on their minds.

There are people out there that can still make good horror flicks. I enjoy the “Saw” franchise, “Shaun of the Dead” and the “Dawn of the Dead” remake, but each one of them has something in common. They are not PG-13. With all of these horror films going for the scary PG-13 rating, nothing good is or will be coming out. Studios look for the under 17 year old market for movies while pushing out the people that love real horror.

Until PG-13 films start tanking at the box office we will get Emo characters moping around, or whatever big breasted new comer screeching out bad lines. Horror is not for the Teens or early teens.It is for those that can take a real scare. Let the kids have time as kids while the more grown-up enjoy the real horror of seeing a man saw his own leg off.

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